Change is difficult. It’s a fact that can be found throughout the Earth. I don’t know many people who would disagree. Even in the most advanced, up-to-date societies there is still a resistance against change, in some form, no matter how small. As humans, we find comfort in routine and pattern. They help us develop a sense of predictability which I, personally, am prone to crave. As much as the idea of spontaneity interests me, I would much rather know what’s coming and be prepared, rather than waiting for it to hit without a shred of provision.
Copyright: Brian Jackson / 123RF
I think that is what makes change so hard. It’s stepping out of something known and familiar and, in some cases, good or at least functional. It’s walking into something that could be better, but also could be worse. In some ways, it’s a gamble. It requires vulnerability, knowledge building, and trust. All of these can be challenging individually, let alone the task of undergoing them all at the same time.
In those moments while I am suffering in change, I find that I’m desperate to lean into someone or something. I find people in which to confide my apprehensions and fears. I turn to things to help manage the stress. Even good things, such as exercise, don’t ultimately ease my fears and anxieties when used as the sole tool to relieve worry. That’s when I hear God’s voice. It’s one that has been there the whole time; I was drowning it out with the internal shouts of insecurities and external talks resulting in well-intentioned, but often imperfect, opinions and advice.
In my head, I tell myself, I am not ready for change. I can’t do it. It will not work out. I feel I need to take control, change it back to the operative life aspect I am accustomed to. It feels as if there’s no way that I will be able to survive, let alone thrive, with this new change. However, Scripture is full of God’s promises to help ease my anxieties. It says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding” (Prov. 3:5 ESV). Philippians 4:13 (ESV) reminds me: “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” He is with me every step; I am never alone. He is lifting me up in transition and he will never leave or forsake me. My sight is incomplete compared to his omniscient vision where he sees the past, present, and future.
So, with a deep breath and anxiety, I open my heart to God during times of change. I lean into him and know that he is with me. However challenging the alteration I am going through may be, I know that I can do it with him.
Sarah has been going to The River since July 2018. Her husband, Eric, and she moved to the Bay Area in July 2017. As a new(ish) resident to the area, she loves to explore. She works as a nurse in a local hospital. When not working or socializing, you can find her curled up with her cat, Maggie.