The River Church Community

Hello Precious Angel Helpers,

Sorry that posted before I was done.  I am so joyful to be a mom and so very grateful that you are all praying for us and especially about Hannah Jane's surgery that is still scheduled for Friday, but will be canceled if we can't get the insurance payment fixed before tomorrow. 

When I had the MRI with Hannah Jane in my tummy her head size was measuring four weeks larger than her gestational age.  The u/s the week before her birth was encouraging in estimating 2 weeks ahead and upon her birth her head was measuring average size.  We now understand why her head size fluxuates and was so large then and thank God is not now at the present moment - there is a mass (unknown if it is a tumor, disorganized brain matter, cyst etc. and whether or not it is benign) until they go in and can get a bisopsy at surgery.  This mass that is in her 3rd venticle is usually blocking approx 90% of the fluid that needs to flow through, so sometimes there is fluid that is allowed to get through and sometimes not, when the fluid can't get through her head size increases, like it did during the fetal MRI and when the approx 10% can get through it stabalizes.

Her lateral ventricles are severely enlarged still. Right now, while her head is now average size at any time the pressure can increase and cause it to bulge and increase possibliity of developmental damage.  This is why Dr. Edwards feels we must operate now before this can be allowed to happen.  Delaying and transfering her care to Kaiser means that she will not receive surgery this week risking damage and it is possilbe that Kaiser won't do the surgery for an undetermined period of time.  They have many hoops that we would need to jump through vs. Stanford who has been tracking her in utero since her diagnosis.  We transferred care here specifically because of Dr. Edwards and his extensive experience in surgery for hydrocephalus. 

If we can have the surgery here, Dr. Edwards is hoping to be able to remove this mass and allow the fluid to drain.  If he is unable to remove the mass due to too much bleeding or damage to the ventricle he will try to make a slit in another part of her brain to allow it to hopefully drain that way.  She may need a tube to drain out fluid and create a way to prevent build up of pressure, but any port from her brain to the outside creates the risk of infection.  If there is any bleeding during the surgery that cannot be suctioned and controlled he will have to close immediately and try for surgery later.  Even a drop of blood that is uncontrollled clouds the view - it is like a drop of ink being dropped into a glass of water in that it clouds the view and creates greater possibility of damage.

God is indeed with us though every step of the way.  The fact that her ventricles are severely enlarged actually works in our favor because they are holding back her brain matter to give a better view of the mass.  We also met with the nurse from the NICU that will be Hannah Jane's caregiver after surgery.  She prepared us by telling us what to expect in seeing Hannah Jane then i.e. the shaved head, bandage, color change, stillness and that she will be on a ventilator for hopefully a short, but still undetermined amount of time.  They showed us a baby on a ventilator so that we could prepare for that.

It is so hard for us to have our precious baby go into surgery, but we want to help her and give her every chance at a normal life.  We do not want her to wait for Kaiser and we sincerely appreciate if you would pray for God to make a way for her to get help and surgery as soon as possible.  We are trusting in Him every step of the way, but truthfully, we have cried and cried over and over during this journey of faith.  While we are encouraged, it seems that each day and many days several times a day there is a new very, very high hurdle to jump to give Hannah Jane the best we can.  We believe that God is lifting us up over them and it is not of our strength, but of His that gets us up and over. 

We are weary, we are scared and we are exhausted, we are desperate to give our daughter everything we can.  Yet we are only human.  Rod and I would give anything to take this from Hannah Jane and be in her place to prevent her this journey. 

I prayed and begged, God why can't this happen to me and not my beautiful, innocent, precious daughter?   I have sinned and am flawed, yet she is innocent of sin.  I would spare her anything if only I could.  I love her so very much.  I am so deeply blessed to be her mom.  God has given me all I ever desired - Rod, my husband who I love with all my heart and who is not only my dearest love, but my best friend through these past 7 years.  He has seen me through more than you can imagine.

And out of our love, God blessed us with the most amazingly beautiful daughter who is even more beautiful in spirit than she is in flesh.  I am so very humbled to have received her and Rod into my life as my family.  I can scarcely believe that I actually am his wife and Hannah Jane's mom.  I will never be able to express in words how sacred it is to me to be his wife and her mommy.  I never knew that my heart could expand millions of times over and over with love for them both.

Right now, Rod is down with Hannah Jane loving her as only her daddy can.  He is simply the best.  I am overflowing with gratitude.  It is truly a miracle to have given birth to Hannah Jane.  I couldn't wait to get out of recovery to hold her to my heart and sing to her the song I sang all through my pregnancy to her.  "I love you Lord and I lift my voice to worship You, oh my soul.  Rejoice.  Take joy my King in what you hear, may it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear.  She nursed that very day and as I sang and rocked her with Rod's hand on my shoulder and also stroking Hannah Jane's cheek my heart burst out of my chest with joy. 

I will never be the same again.  This journey has forever changed me.  I feel so very loved and blessed by God and your prayers and encouragement are sealed forever in my heart as miracles of love and I am so grateful that each of you has allowed God to work through you and bless our Geoghegan family.  I am grateful to you always.

I am so very sorry that I quite behind in writing thank you notes.  Please know that it is not because I/we are not incredibly appreciative, grateful and blessed by each of you, it is that we literally have days that are filled with meetings, consults, doctors, financial arrangements, tests, etc.  Please forgive me that I have not sent out more thank yous.  Many of you barely know us, yet have blessed us many fold.  I pray that God also bless you and give you His peace and encouragement.

I am grateful to you all and cannot wait for the day that I get to go home  with Rod and Hannah Jane and bring her healthy and happy to meet you in person!

Hannah Jane is truly is a miracle - on 9/11 at 8:39 AM my life changed forever.  What once represented a day of endings for so many people has become a new beginning for our family.  I hope you know that you are part of our family as well and that I am so glad to be on this journey with you.  While I may not be able to see you in person right now, I feel your presence and love.  I hope you know that I keep you in my prayers as well.  We love you all.

A very BIG thank you to Stacy for being our special angel helper who gives up her time day and night to not only update this site, but gives us endless encouragement and love!

Also a huge thank you to Tony, Mai, Ariel and Hayden for opening their home to us so that at nights we can be minutes away from the hospital!

Another special thank you to Pastor Brad for coming to love and welcome Hannah Jane into the River Family.  His blessing will live on in our hearts always!

Thank you for ALL your prayers, we pray to have good news soon!

We are trusting in Him moment by moment - God's presence is sustaining us and I pray you too.

With love always,
Shannon
aka Rod's wife and now also blessed to be Hannah Jane's mommy

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